Skip to main content

Time...

Image
By
Day 17: Time-


This month marks 12 years since my very first loss...

This spring was 8 years since my second loss...

This summer made 5 Years since my third loss, which was at  19 weeks gestation....

It has been 34 months since we started this journey to TTC again.....

31 months since our "first loss" this time TTC....

17 losses consecutively after that...So many "should be" due dates, so many loss dates....

It has been 7 months and 1 week, since we were "officially" diagnosed with our immune issues...

5 months 1 week since our "last cycle TTC" with our immune meds...

4 months, 3 weeks and 1 day since my last ever  methotrexate injection for our 3rd ectopic...


1 Month and 3 days since our last loss, our 4th ectopic, that look my right tube...

Two days since our memorial/balloon release/candle lighting...






How much time will it take for me to "get over" losing so many of my precious amazing babies?....Forever....and ever....and ever....

Comments

Post a Comment

Thanks for any and all comments,

Popular posts from this blog

What you should know if you are considering a tubal reversal

By
Its been 8 years. 8 years since we took a trip to NC to see DR. Montieth in Chapel Hill. I remember being so excited. I had this picture in my head of how it was going to go during, and after it all. For those of you who don't know, I had my tubes tied in 2009, after the birth of my 3rd, directly following a traumatic still birth. It was a decision made out of fear and trauma, not an informed decision. I ended up having adverse health issues (PTLS) after, and was desperate to find a solution. I stumbled upon a private chat room with others also struggling. Several had gone for a reversal, and seemed to feel so MUCH better after. I had already seen my doctor umpteen times, and they offered no solutions, and insinuated it was "in my head".... I saw all of these ladies posting the day OF surgery saying that they felt relief! I was like, "Yes, this is it!!"... So we saved the 6 Grand, and went and did the reversal. I was PUMPED. I started a blog, YouTube video and F...
1 comment
Read more

Some statistics on Miscarriage

By
Miscarriage Statistics Overall miscarriage risk is 17-22%; risk after gestational sac is visible is 12-15% Miscarriage is one of the most frequent problems in human pregnancy. The most widely accepted definition is that proposed by the World Health Organization in 1977. The incidence among clinical pregnancies  (a pregnancy that is confirmed by both high levels of hCG and ultrasound confirmation of a gestational sac)  is about 12-15%, but including early pregnancy losses it is 17-22%. http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11950476 After heartbeat is detected, risk of miscarriage is 9.4% at 6wks; 4.2% at 7wks; 1.5% at 8wks; 0.5% at 9wks To estimate the risk of miscarriage among asymptomatic women after a prenatal visit between 6 and 11 weeks of gestation where proof of fetal viability of a singleton was obtained by office ultrasonography at the same visit. METHODS: Those recruited were 697 asymptomatic women who attended their first antenatal ...
Post a Comment
Read more

Trust & New Pajamas

By
So, a blog comment I got the other day from wonderful woman, and awesome supporter of mine, caused me to pause a bit, and kind of evaluate some things about my faith and relationship with God. Which I truly appreciate, because she was kind and not judgy in her words...And I felt God gently nudge my heart each time I read the comment over... I felt my face start to burn with emotion, as tears welled up in my eyes...And I finally admitted to myself... I do NOT trust God...At least not fully, like I once did... But I desperately WANT to be at that point again....Trusting fully...And filled with peace... I walked into this journey,  to try for one more, 100% SURE , God was calling us/giving us the desire  to have another baby...I/we were, 100% certain we would walk away with a baby in our arms...As a matter of fact, I would have bet my LIFE on it. Now, 3 years later, I am broken, weary, and so utterly soul shattered, that I simply cannot "look" God in the eyes...H...
10 comments
Read more