Sunday, February 17, 2013

Names...

Over the last two years, I have not ONCE thought about baby names, or nurseries etc...I just have not been able to bring myself to even day dream about it or buy baby stuff (with the exception of two outfits I bought the month before my surgery) etc....

I always have waited in the past, till the pregnancy was well established before  I started narrowing down names and thinking themes for the nursery and buying gear...especially THIS go around, when it seems like  whatever can go wrong, HAS already....Anyway....

Today, I have been thinking about our much hoped and prayed for (future) baby, and praying for some confirmation to keep me kind of hanging on till we see our promise come to fruition....I kept being brought back to 3 years ago, when we first started our journey to a reversal for another baby, (and to help with physical issues from my ligation, which have been gone since the reversal) and all the things that had to happen to even make it possible to have the money and even the time for the surgery, and so many other issues we had to over come time and time again, Just for us to be able to have a shot at "trying again"....And yet, all the obstacles we faced, we overcame each one...

I began to meditate on the all the POSITIVE things  that I have happened in our journey, the things I have learned about myself and the the people I have met ... Then, I was brought back to a time, right before we got the money for the reversal, (2010) when it seemed like all was lost for even being able to afford the surgery ( car repairs and crazy medical bills)...It was THEN, (confirmed through a couple friends at a revival service in May 2010)  I felt like the Lord gave me a name for our soon to be baby blessing that DH had been praying for for even though we had NO way to even try for a baby yet. (reversal was not done yet).

The name is Josiah...

One of my fave names I used to have growing up, for my "future babies" when I would day dream as a kid...I knew, then and there, we would be blessed with another baby boy, I just did not know when...

So up until today, I had never REALLY looked into the name, and what it means, because, well, we have not been pregnant long enough this go around to even consider names at all...But any time names come up, I go research crazy....It something I HAVE to do before it is even an "option" on the table as a name...I like to know what they mean before I name my kid...lol... Anyway, I digress....

So, this afternoon, I am just sitting there looking through baby names, and kind of allowing myself to savor the non jaded moment and day dream about our future baby,  and I kept hearing Josiah in my head again...After all, The Lord has brought us THIS far, why not believe for the full miracle....

So, I got thinking, and kind of hoping.... I did a quick Google search for what the name means just to see....I was blown away...

"The name Josiah is a baby boy name. The name Josiah comes from the Hebrew origin. In Hebrew The meaning of the name Josiah is: Jehovah has healed."

I instantly had my heart skip a beat when I saw the part that said..."Jehovah has healed"...I am believing I am healed, from all this crap in my body, and we will bring home our take home baby boy soon...I think of all we have endured and have overcome, and I am confident we will make it through this with a baby in our arms on the other side of it all....

4 comments:

  1. I can't help but see that you typed this on the the 17th. If you read my post, "Sweet Dreams" then you will see this number is HUGE in my book :) The biblical meaning is "victory over the enemy". Hold fast the confession of your hope, because He who promised is faithful." Hebrews 10:23

    http://waitingforbabybird.com/2013/11/16/sweet-dreams/

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    1. Thank you...I am trying, so hard...Its been so LONG, and with sooo MANY losses, and so many bad reports from DR's, it just wears on your faith and hope...I SOOooooooo want to see God be victorious in this area of my life....I spent 2 years, speaking out scriptures, having my husband lay hands on my everyday, and call things that are not to be, as they are so...Speaking LIFE and wholeness into my body...The whole church was praying for me and over me...More losses, and one that almost took MY life as a result...But, no matter HOW BLEAK and slim those odds are, in my heart, deep down, I HOPE...I silently pray...I hope again..And again...Even when the rest of the world is telling me I am NUTS...I hope...

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    2. I do however, worry about how much mmore my BODY can take...if it was as simple as NOT getting pregnant, I would not give up til my eggs quit! BUT, because we can GET pregnant, it makes things very hard...I dont believe God would cause the losses, but WHY, after more than 15 consecutive losses, he has not stepped in...? ya know?

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