Purpose Driven Motherhood

Of course, I have been doing this long enough (57 cycles now) to know that a pretty chart means nothing when it comes to pregnancy/baby, and especially in OUR case, it means literally nothing ...BUT, still...Look at that! I started tracking my cycles again with temps this month...Its been a while since I actually used my BBT therm.... I wanted to see where I was at cycle wise with managing my PCOS and IR issues and make sure I am documenting my luteal phase and ovulation days to see if we get any progress with balancing those out now that I am taking the metformin again....I kind of miss charting now that I am back at it again...It helps me feel a bit more in the "know" and feel in control... And to be honest, I KINDA started back at it again too, because we have stopped "preventing" again, and are just "seeing what happens"...Its probably a stupid move on my part, but at this point, why not? I have not been had any traumatic losses (that lasted m

Merry Christmas and happy new year to everyone!! I hope this years holiday season was filled with more joy than tears for all of you!  Just wanted to write a quick post and spill out some of my feelings somewhere...I am aware most of the readers I had before probably aren't even keeping up anymore...so this is really just a therapeutic place for me to vent at this point...anyway... January 4 is always a hard day for me...it would've been my father's 61st birthday, and should have been Hannah's seventh birthday...but neither of them are here on this earth to celebrate ... Both were taken far too soon...  To top it off, I started AF that day, which only reminded me that my body is broken...that I will never bring forth life again from my womb...it doesn't help that there are new babies all around the church too...I am not so bitter anymore that I can't be happy for them, I truly am... I just hate the odds at which we have been faced with. And I'm not sure the